Mop says red wine is for drinking, not spilling on new yellow skirts: whoever said Perth was boring (part 2)

We have failed miserably at the challenge and managed to spend a combined total of $160 on taxis and alcohol. All we have to show for it now is a hangover and lots of stamps on our arms. We did however, get an education about the best place to go at 5 am on a Saturday morning. This place was home and we reached this verdict after the following itinerary*:

8 :00 Drinks at Mop and Suzie's house
9:30 Taxi to Newport Hotel, Fremantle
11:30 Mop meets us in Freo after work
12:45 Picked up Scarborough Pizza
12:50 Back to Mop and Suzie's to eat Scarborough Pizza and watch Zoolander.
1:15 Stamford Arms, Scarborough - Mop and Shendelle left Suzie at home to wait for the random people (Shendelle's workmate Ree, her brother and 2 of her brothers friends) to leave.
2:00 Lookout, Scarborough
2:15 Llama Bar, Subiaco
2:45 Red Sea, Subiaco
3:15 Club A, Scarborough - about 7 people here, large proportion of body hair to amount of skin.
3:30 Base, Northbridge - not many people here either. Smelt like spew.
3:35 Rise, Northbridge - attempted this place but they wanted $12 entry and would not even let us in for free
3:40 Paramount, Northbridge - once again, not many people here
3:50 Geisha, Northbridge - not very busy, decided it was not worth the $15 they wanted to get in.
3:55 Connections, Northbridge - Apparently lesbians are not attracted to us cos we did not get hit on once the whole time we were here.
4:00 Wandered around the rest of Northbridge, noting that apart from forementioned locations, nothing else was open. Even Exotica strip club was about to close and would not let us in. We used this time to talk to people on the street**, sharing our disappointment in the quality of nightspots in Northbridge on a Friday night / Saturday morning.
4:35 Stood outside Rise watching some very strange people attempt to fight.
4:45 Got a taxi back home.

* Times are approximations.
** People on the street at this time are generally quite drunk, Asian or strange (e.g the vet guy wearing a jumpsuit)