A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away…

Episode 1: A New Novelty Item
There is unrest in the Mop and Suz household. The girls have declared their intentions to drink lots of alcohol. This alcoholic movement, under the leadership of Count Vodka, is difficult due to the limited number of mixers to maintain peace and order in the Cosmop. Cranberry Juice is vital to the mission. The journey to the place of Cranberry was fraught with danger, ferocious dogs and scary old men at every corner. On reaching the shops, it was realised that in order to complete the evening's mission of getting drunk and laughing lots, ping pong balls must be purchased.

Episode 2: Attack of the Ping Pong
It is a period of civil war. Rebels Mop and Suz, striking from a hidden base, have won their first victory against the evil neighbour. The evil neighbour's base is catapulted with the first of 12 ping pong balls. During the battle, Neighbour spies managed to steal secret plans to the Empire's ultimate weapon, the Ping Ping Ball, a supersonic plastic implement with enough power to destroy an entire planet.

Episode 3: The Phantom Ping Pong Attack
Turmoil has engulfed the Mop and Suzie household. The upstairs / downstairs route is in dispute. The steps are plagued with supersonic plastic implements, leading to exteme Occupational Health and Safety risks. While the congress of the Neighbour endlessly denies this alarming chain of events, the Supreme Neighbour is a prime suspect.

Episode 4: The Empire of Mop and Suz strikes back
It is a dark time for Mop and Suz. Although the Occupational Health and Safety risk has been destroyed, the threat of further attack looms. Evading the dreaded stairway Ping Pong Extravaganza, a group of freedom fighters led by Mop and Suzie have dispatched thousands of remote Ping Pong Balls into the far reaches of the evil neighbours vehicle...

Episode 5: Revenge of the Neighbour
War! The Neighbour is crumbling under attacks by the ruthless Mop and Suzie. There are heroes on both sides. Evil is everywhere.

Coming Soon
Episode 6: Return of the Sanity

Mop and Suzie go star searching

In recent days/weeks, Mop has taken into revealing what our destiny, heart, personality and expression numbers. Quite surprisingly we have seemed to find out a little more about ourselves, which we perhaps knew already – but seem to have taken it into a different light.

Suzie’s destiny number is 9. She is a competitive bitch who strives for perfection and has no consideration for others. She cannot make up her mind when it comes to work and relationships, and insists on making things difficult for other people, but at the same time make things easier for herself. (Something about ordering food and sharing comes to mind...)

Mop’s destiny number is 3. She is a flirt, has and always will be. This indicates that she will most likely end up in divorce, simply because she feels that she hasn’t been treated like a princess. She needs to travel, is sociable and optimistic, and needs to be challenged. She hates to think that she is missing out on anything - she has a need to know, (but also knows) everything.

With this information in mind, we figure it is quite lucky that we have not ended up in a punch up due to our conflicting personalities that somehow seem to complement each other. If you wish to know your numbers, please contact Mop with your name and date of birth and she will gladly consult the best numerology book ever.

Why we have decided to stop buying fresh vegetables...

It has taken us 10 months of living here for us to realise that we throw out more vegtables than what we eat. We have decided that to amend this problem we will stop buying vegetables and either throw the $20 a week in the bin or spend our money on more useful items...such as large jars of vegemite.

A worthwhile way to spend the next 60 seconds of your life

Best Llama Song Ever

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/llama.php

Mop's Identity Crisis

Mop is currently undergoing an identity crisis. She thinks she is the Easter Bunny.

Mop and Suzie's Theory On ... What Makes a Good Neighbour?

Good Neighbour Characteristic Number 1: They give us stuff
Part of being a good neighbour is sharing excessive amounts of things that you don't want. A great way to pawn off large bags of limes would be to give them to us, as we like to use them in our Cosmop cocktails. Neighbours should also be available to give us sugar, flour, eggs, condoms, vodka etc.

Good Neighbour Characteristic Number 2: They help us with stuff
Due to convenience, neighbours are the most useful people to call on in times of need. Times of need may include flat batteries, inability to assemble furniture, a lack of bubble wrap or excessive drunkenness leading to inability to drive.

Good Neighbour Characteristic Number 3: They invite us to barbecues regularly
Everybody loves a barbecue. Not everybody has a barbecue. This is why neighbours should always own a barbecue and invite us to consume food cooked on it often. These neighbourly barbecues should also be social occasions, bringing us to...

Good Neighbour Characteristic Number 4: They have hot friends
Unfortunately we seem to have a habit of thinking that the neighbour's friends are hot whilst under the influence of alcohol and being terribly disappointed in the morning. There is no escape from the evil neighbour friends who may develop stalking tendencies. This problem would be overcome if the neighbour's friends were attractive in the first place.

Good Neighbour Characteristic Number 5: Entertainment Value
The most effective way to cure boredom is to go and spend time with someone who is even boreder* than you. Neighbour's homes are often an untapped resource for CDs, DVDs, weird senses of humour and internet nerdism, all of which provide great entertainment.

Memorable Neighbour Moments:

• The time that we did not read the instructions of how to put the IKEA table together and managed to ruin our neighbour's drill bits whilst attempting to work it out. Being the lovely neighbours we are, we purchased a new set of drill bits for him.
• Providing a location for our neighbours to wrap presents.
• Being able to hear the sound effects to "The Newest Olympic Sport"
• Borrowing a lawnmover. Trying to work out how to use it.
• Using 4 neighbours to start one car with a flat battery. Turns out you need to put a foot on the brake to be able to put the car in neutral.
• Sending a neighbour's friend to Officeworks to buy 25 metres of bubble wrap.
• Talking to the neighbour on MSN despite him being 20 metres away.
• Calling our neighbour Craig for about 3 months before we were told his name was actually "Gray"
• Sharing taxis to various locations
• Sharing Scarborough Pizza

After writing this we have decided that we are quite possibly the Best Neighbours EVER.

*No, it is probably not a word

Mop and Suzie's theory on... skinny jeans

One thing that stands out in both our minds right now is the Supre ad on TV. It is not just the fact that we haven't like the majority of Supre clothing for a long time now (just seemed to have grown out of it or something?!), but also the fact that they are advertising skinny jeans.

WE HATE SKINNY JEANS.

Reason why we hate skinny jeans number 1:
What happens if you don't have skinny legs? You don't see anybody advertising fat leg jeans. Or fat arse jeans. No, it is just skinny leg jeans.

Reason why we hate skinny jeans number 2:
Skinny people don't even look good in them! It seems that no matter how anorexic or drug worn you are, skinny jeans give you the most unflattering figure. They make your arse look huge - now you can see the problem this causes when not so skinny people where them.

Reason why we hate skinny jeans number 3:
80s clothes were not even cool in the 80s, so why try and reinvent this most stupid fashion? We are suprised that the girls at Go Fug Yourself have not had more to say about this.

Reason why we hate skinny jeans number 4:
The 80s rock look also seems to have had its day. People try and pull off this rock look and they just seem to end up looking like some pyscho-crazy rich-girl gothic chick. We suggest wearing a dress or a skirt or other jeans instead.

Reason why we hate skinny jeans number 5:
Bootleg jeans were one of the best inventions ever for the fact that you can cover up your shoes. The Jerry Seinfeld look seems to be reappearing because people are wearing sneakers with their skinny leg jeans. Not Cool. The last time we encounted Jerry Seinfeld fashion was at a pub in Jindibyne by a seedy old male that was trying to crack onto us (well, Shendelle and Mop at least, Suz would have hated it too) which was really not cool.

Once again, if you didn't get the point: WE HATE SKINNY JEANS.

Mop and Suz, inspiring random people...

"So, why have I all of a sudden decided to start up a new blog? Well I spent a portion of my day at work surfing around a few blogs which belong to fellow Perth folk. I must say that I was inspired by The Adventures of Mop and Suz in particular. Some of the funniest stuff I have read in a long time and being a fellow 'Perthite' it all seems so relevant! These two gals from Scabs are a crack up - I definately suggest checking it out." - The Horgz Files (http://thehorgzfiles.blogspot.com/)

Impulse Buy of the Week

[This is what $12.06 worth of Vegemite looks like]