The 30 Day challenge: It's all over...

For those of you that are not regular readers (bah!), the writers of "The Adventures of Mop and Suzie" took up the challenge of not buying alcohol and not paying for taxis for 30 days (25th April - 25th May). Mop lasted 10 days, Suzie came in at a whopping 18 days. Aside from the fact that we have both discovered that we do not have the mental or physical strength to accept such a challenge, we can't but help think that our exuces are perfectly legitimate, and anyone in the same situation would do as we did.

Lame excuse for failing the 30 Day Challenge Number 1:
Mop and Shendelle went to Black Betty's on Day 10. The previous time Mop had visited this wonderful pub, she happened to get spewed all over by some lovely patron. Having the ordacity to go there again, the only way to overcome the memory of this past painful night was to drown her sorrows with alcohol, so at least if it happened again, she could spew right back on them.

Lame excuse for failing the 30 Day Challenge Number 2:
It turns out that when somebody gives you a lift to the pub, and then wants to leave, and you don't want to, the only way to get home is to catch a cab - and then pay for it. Enough said.

Lame excuse for failing the 30 Day Challenge Number 3:
We soon discovered that in Perth it is sometimes difficult to get people to buy you drinks. The only way to overcome this problem is to buy them yourself. In addition to this, if someones buys a round of drinks, the only polite thing to do is buy a round back.

Lame excuse for failing the 30 Day Challenge Number 4:
We have discovered that alcohol really does make people better looking, better dancers, and more interesting to talk to. If you're having a bit of trouble picking up, at least alcohol can make that 19 year old seem so much more appealing.

Lame excuse for failing the 30 Day Challenge Number 5:
We owed it to Shendelle... she couldn't stand drinking by herself, it's just no fun... and if one of our friends is bored and unhappy, we can't but not help them out. Drinks all round we say!

Why we like... Peter's By the Sea

Reason why we like Peter's By the Sea Number 1:
Good food. Except when they gave us a frozen chicko roll, although, like a places with good customer service, they cooked us another and even delivered it to our table.

Reason why we like Peter's By the Sea Number 2:
Greatest alchohol absorber ever. Especially when you are hammered at the Stamford Arms, and think that is you have one more drink you are going to spew (there goes that class again). We recommend a chicken kebab with the lot, a chicko roll and large chips... each. (tee hee hee)

Reason why we like Peter's By the Sea Number 3:
They play Zorba's Dance, and all the boys behind the counter dance like monkeys. It's fantastic.

Reason why we like Peter's By the Sea Number 4:
There is a toilet... we always need a toilet, especially when you are drunk.

Reason why we like Peter's By the Sea Number 5:
Aside from Tuart Hill McDonald's and our favourite Scarborough Pizza, this is one of the few places that is open at 3:00 in the morning, we you are absolutely starving for a feed. You are guaranteed to have a wonderful chat to a lot of drunk people, and have a good feed at a reasonable price.

Quotable Quote : Team America

Despite being a relatively dodgy movie, there are a few classic quotes in Team America. One of our favourites....

Gary Johnston: A flying limo? Now I've seen everything.
Spottswoode: Really? Have you ever seen a man eat his own head?
Gary Johnston: No.
Spottswoode: So you HAVEN'T seen everything.

Why We Like ... The Deen

Reason Why We Like the Deen Number 1: Pacman
Yes, you heard right...PACMAN. The Deen has an old school arcade game machine that has Pacman on it, for the bargain price of $1 a game. This is quite the crowd puller and a convenient way to wait for your friends while they go to the bathroom or attempt the photo booth challenge.

Reason Why We Like the Deen Number 2: $8 jugs on Mondays
This is just one of the benefits of Monday nights at the Deen. For more information please see the blog entitled "Backpacker are tight-arses : http://mopandsuz.blogspot.com/2005/04/backpackers-are-tight-arses.html#comments

Reason Why We Like the Deen Number 3: Music for every taste

The Deen has a outside back bar with a band (with a name like Booty Jooce how could you go wrong). It also has 2 areas with DJs. There is sure to be music to suit everyone at the Deen.... that is, unless you are a country bumpkin bootscooter.

Reason Why We Like the Deen Number 4: Backpackers

Yes, we say they are tight-asses but we still love backpackers because they suit short attention spans. Even though 90% of the people at the Deen on Backpackers night are not actually backpackers we can pretend that they are after excessive consumption of Reason Number 2.

Reason Why We Like the Deen Number 5: Hours of Operation

This is one of the few pubs that appears to be open every night of the week until about 3am.

The $500 Date

Our love for The West Magazine and the "Go Figure" statistics, has given us new ideas for our blog, seeing as we are apparently bored (Shendelle).

This week, we found out that the average cost of a date in Britain is $500. Now, most of you who haven't previously read this magazine, are probably thinking exactly the same as we were - $500 is a hell of a lot of money to spend on a date (well, even 250 Pounds). We have devised a number of dates that we think $500 would be usful for.

The Adventure Date:
Consisting of a bungee jump for two in the morning, then spending the rest of the day running around Adventure World, eating chips and hotdogs, and "drinking" out of a paper bag.

The Road Trip Date:
Buy two one-way tickets to Sydney on Virgin Blue, spend the left over money on alcohol for the flight over, and then think of it as a game, as to how to get home (We think hitch-hiking is a great idea). *Note: this would also be a way of having an extended date.

The Rebel Date:
Purchase a hotel room at the Rendevous Observation City, turn every "Do not disturb / Please make up my room" sign to the opposite on every door in the hotel. We figure a room costs about $271 for the night. An additional $200 could be used to exchange in to 5c pieces, that could be used to throw off the balcony at the 16 year old losers going to the Lookout. Remaining $29 to be spent on Goon (how's that for value?).

The I'm-Trying-My-Hardest-to-Get-a-Shag Date
Multiple bottles of Moet, lobster, oysters, candles, new satin sheets, bubble bath, sexy lingerie (for him or her), a gramophone with Andy Williams singing Moon River on record, a calendar that shows when full moons occur to ensure that you will be able to dance in the moonlight. If that doesn't get 'em into bed, nothing will.

The Selfish Date
Inviting potential partner to come shopping and watch you spend $500 on yourself.

The Pimp Daddy Date:
This wonderful date consists of purchasing a video camera, followed by some all night shenanigans in the bedroom. Recordings of such acts could be sold on the internet, and Hey! Presto!, you got your $500 back.

The Nerd Date:
Spend approximately 18 hours playing old-school "Pacman" at The Deen, drinks could also be included, as well as a photo booth challenge (for more information see Little Amy).

The Date of All Dates:
$500 buys a hell of a lot of Scarborough Pizza. We have a spa and the ingredients to make Cosmops and Squashed Rats. To add to this, we have an extensive range of DVDs, a couch, beds, blankets. That's all we have to say about that......any takers ;o)

6 minutes

Right now we are waiting for the microwave to cook the Lean Cuisine Lasagne. It takes 6 minutes. 6 minutes doesnt seem like such a long time until you are sitting there doing absolutely nothing. Here are some other things that we could have done during the 6 minutes instead of complaining about how long 6 minutes is...

• Checked e-mail
• Cleaned bathroom
• Watched the weather on the news
• Watched the funny film clip where the guy plays the piano in an oh-so-interesting way
• Had a QF with a rabbit-style partner
• Had 12 shooters (at the moment these would most likely be Squashed Rats)
• Put on dress ups from the dress up box and taken photos
• Sort M&Ms into colours
• Cleaned out the fish bowl (although no fish in it so no point)
• Written a letter to Ockerby to ask if we can park in their car park seeing as they dont like us parking on OUR path (council schmouncil)
• Burnt a compilation CD
• Popped bubble wrap (with the remaining 15 metres we have left)
• Written a blog entry about things than can be done in 6 minutes
• Marked 24 spelling tests
• Do a uni reading
• Put the fans in the shed because it is not summer any more and we don't need them

We are sure there are many, many other things that can be done in 6 minutes. We are looking for creative suggestions....

Suzie the Hard Core Loner : A half arsed review

Turns out none of my friends like the same music as I do so I went to the Antistatic, Karnivool and Cog BY MYSELF! This is the first time I have done this since I went to see Tool at the Entertainment Centre by myself a few years back. I was fortunate enough to get the third last ticket, thanks to Chels who works behind the bar at the Rosemount.

I wanted to go to this gig because I really like Antistatic and I think they are one of the best local bands Perth has to offer. I have heard a but of Karnivool but never heard them live so I though this would be a good opportunity. The hype around Cog suggests that they are the "best rock band in Australia" and although I wasnt a huge fan of the songs I had heard I though it might be good to see them as a live act.

I arrived just in time to see the start of Antistatic's set. They were playing a lot of new material which I thought was awesome. Apparently they are sick of playing their old songs and the nu-metal image that thir music portrays. I was a little disappointed as I love Dilate and I didnt hear it. They got the mosh pit cranking for Underwhelmed, proabably as this was one of the few songs recognised by the crowd (which was pretty strong by this time).

While waiting for Karnivool I managed to find some friends (Jarrad and friends from Hope Here Gone, Sarag G, girls from work and some various randoms asking for a black pen to scam their way in...). I also managed to score a free bourbon and coke woohoo. By the time Karnivool were on, the venue was pretty packed. Although I didn't know their material terribly well, I though Karnivool were awesome. I did think the singer looked rather retarded at times with the whole pulling faces things but his vocals were amazing so it's OK. I bought Themata and am looking forward to seeing these fellas agin.

By the time Cog FINALLY set up and started to play I was getting tired and bored (oooh I am getting old, it wasnt even midnight yet). The first song was great, the second one average, the third one shit and involved a whole heap of political proghanda abou anarchy which pissed me off (I dont care what the song is, don't preach to me). I left after the fourth song, which I think is a pretty clear sign that Cog are not the "best rock band in Australia." I will leave that title to the Butterfly Effect...

*PS - I wrote this small becasue it is so damn long and I dont really know what I am talking about in the music world :o) Dont bag me!

From Suzie the Hard Core Loner

What better way to spend a Friday night....

.....than watching some of Perth's best local talent supporting Cog and for only $15...

Cog, Karnivool & Antistatic Friday May 20th - Rosemount Hotel, North Perth (this friday stoners!) Tickets are $15 - presale from the Rosemount or at the door - if there's any left...

freak. n. 1 monstrosity. 2 abnormal person or thing. 3 colloq. unconventional person. 4 fanatic of specific kind.

Thursday, 19th May 2005, 12:01am - The official opening of Star Wars Episode 3: Revenge of the Sith. People having been lining up since 9:00pm. Darth Vadars are seen duelling with light-sabors. Madness is everywhere.

So what exactly is the fascination with Star Wars? This film series has been the beginning of a cult that is surely going to exist for centuries, probably the equivalent in some ways to the controversial Illuminati. Even more interesting, is more modern times that have brought the release of Episodes 1, 2 and finally, 3, where Darth Vadar is born. With the release of these new films, new freaks and nerds have been born, and us "normal" folk have nothing better to do than sit there and ogle at such characters, that obviously have been awaiting this release since they took their first breaths.

Everybody knows, that where you find Star Wars, you find nerds. But we have discovered that there are two kinds of nerds, that is, nerds who are nerds, and then you have nerds that dress up (much worse we figure). To demonstrate, we have captured these people in action, out in the wild, however, much to our dismay and bagging of them, we do have to say, that some people looked really cool.

If you check out Channel 10 tonight (Thurs, 19th) you can see the winners of the best dressed competition (and the Blue Girl who we didn't manage to snap, but looked awesome with much effort put in to costuming!)

"May the force be with you"

Cosmops and Squashed Rats

Due to an apparent shortage of alcohol in the cupboard we have been forced to invent new cocktails and shooters. These are loosely based on some of our favourite drinks...

1. The Cosmop
This is basically a tight-ass version of a Cosmopolitan as it is missing the Cointreau. Double the vodka and you wouldn't even know the difference.

2. The Squashed Rat
Squashed frogs have been a popular shooter for a long time. Somehow the idea of a squashed frog has more appeal that the Squashed Rat, which is made using Midori, Kahlua and a bit of Erin Cream*

* Please note: Erin Cream, although a third the price, is no subsitute for Bailey's.

When Shendelle asks you what you would like for your birthday....

.... do not say "hmmm, some random thing that I don't need that will make me laugh" because you may end up with a boogie board such as this....

Please note: This photo does not give justice to the lovely artwork dispayed on this novelty item, nor does it show the amount of love and care that shendelle has put into labeling the characters and writing a birthday message.

Mop says red wine is for drinking, not spilling on new yellow skirts: whoever said Perth was boring (part 2)

We have failed miserably at the challenge and managed to spend a combined total of $160 on taxis and alcohol. All we have to show for it now is a hangover and lots of stamps on our arms. We did however, get an education about the best place to go at 5 am on a Saturday morning. This place was home and we reached this verdict after the following itinerary*:

8 :00 Drinks at Mop and Suzie's house
9:30 Taxi to Newport Hotel, Fremantle
11:30 Mop meets us in Freo after work
12:45 Picked up Scarborough Pizza
12:50 Back to Mop and Suzie's to eat Scarborough Pizza and watch Zoolander.
1:15 Stamford Arms, Scarborough - Mop and Shendelle left Suzie at home to wait for the random people (Shendelle's workmate Ree, her brother and 2 of her brothers friends) to leave.
2:00 Lookout, Scarborough
2:15 Llama Bar, Subiaco
2:45 Red Sea, Subiaco
3:15 Club A, Scarborough - about 7 people here, large proportion of body hair to amount of skin.
3:30 Base, Northbridge - not many people here either. Smelt like spew.
3:35 Rise, Northbridge - attempted this place but they wanted $12 entry and would not even let us in for free
3:40 Paramount, Northbridge - once again, not many people here
3:50 Geisha, Northbridge - not very busy, decided it was not worth the $15 they wanted to get in.
3:55 Connections, Northbridge - Apparently lesbians are not attracted to us cos we did not get hit on once the whole time we were here.
4:00 Wandered around the rest of Northbridge, noting that apart from forementioned locations, nothing else was open. Even Exotica strip club was about to close and would not let us in. We used this time to talk to people on the street**, sharing our disappointment in the quality of nightspots in Northbridge on a Friday night / Saturday morning.
4:35 Stood outside Rise watching some very strange people attempt to fight.
4:45 Got a taxi back home.

* Times are approximations.
** People on the street at this time are generally quite drunk, Asian or strange (e.g the vet guy wearing a jumpsuit)

Mop and Suzie's theory on ... Things to do before 25

Mop is 22 and Suz is 23. These really are 'nothing' ages. We don't have much to look forward from here on, except working and having kids (ew). To make the next few years a bit more interesting we have written a list of things that everyone should attempt to do before the age of 25. We aim to have all of these done.....well actually we have done most of them already but some are things we recommend that everyone else should do.

• Swim naked at the beach (this does not include any age under puberty, must be "adult" status)
• Purchase goldfish and try not to kill one in less than a week
• Go to the movies alone
• Seen the inside of a paddy wagon. As classy females this may be difficult so chatting up cops and asking to have a look is passable.
• Play an instrument (or at least try to). CD players dont count.
• Help a little old lady cross the street
• Talk to a random person whilst waiting for the bus, or on the bus, this must include a decent conversation, not just "hello"
• Travel to at least one continent outside of the one you are from
• See at least one of the wonders of the world
• Scull a yard glass.
• Learn to fly a plane (minumum 1 lesson)
• Join the mile high club
• Sing karaoke
• Volunteer to help the needy on Christmas Day
• Dress up as a fluffy animal
• Go on a date to Skaters on Ice
• Learn to cook one dish extremely well (Suz is stuggling on this one)
• Go to IKEA for half an hour and see who can purchase the most amount of items for $50.00 (must not include more than one of the same item, including different colours)
• Read Bill Bryson's A Short History on Everything
• Use the word 'indubidibly' at least once just cos it sounds funny. Do it...now

To people who are over 25 and havent done these things, sorry but you obviously have no hope now (sorry Brownie and Luke, hope you happen to read this to view the apparent abuse).

The 30 Day Challenge: Day 13

Well.... Although we have used all the loopholes, tecnically we are still sticking to the 30 Day Challenge. Suz paid $20 to go a Manning Football Club Fundraiser. The $20 included $20 worth of drinks,but the monely was truly going towards fundraising, not alcohol. After that ran out the hip flask came in handy ;o)

After we left this at Rosie O'Gradys we got a lift in a taxi to Subi with some lovely guys, including one of the Perth Bachelors from the newspaper - (hi Phil), and a guy that Suzie thought was even more eligible (hi Mark). They paid for the cab so by this stage we were still going strong with the challenge. We went to Sapphire Bar, somehow managing to jump the queue to get straight in as VIPs but it was very disappointing and someone spewed on Sarah. We left after about half an hour, momentarily considering going to the Red Sea but realising it would be no better: (see Dirty Rotten Pub). Unfortunately we then had to get a taxi home. Now, this taxi was only $17, and it was paid by credit card so really, we didnt spend the money the bank did and we will be paying the bank back after the 30 days.

To compensate for this we decided not to get out ritual Scarborough Pizza and instead made our own half arsed pizza which resulted in getting up in the morning to find thick layers of cheese melted all over the kitchen. Right now Mop is whinging about the smell.

And, to make the night complete there was some classy advertising of the website. We stickered quite a few randoms...

Why we like... Mellipop

Mel, we know you quite frequently read this blog, and we quite frequently read yours too... this one's for you...

For those of you who don't "know" Mellipop, her website is found at:
http://mellipop.blogspot.com

Reasons why we like Mellipop Number 1:
She is a fantastic writer. We actually strive to be able to write that fantastically. Unfortunately, we don't have the patience.. or the vocabulary. This rare ability is the usual indication that a book should be written, or maybe a film script... whatever takes your fancy.

Reasons why we like Mellipop Number 2:
Humour that strategically doesn't appear as humour.. but turns out it is! We like to call this intelligent humour. Mel, is the word for this wit?

Reasons why we like Mellipop Number 3:
This blog keeps us entertained for five minutes. Five minutes is all we really need. Anything longer than that and our attention usually goes elsewhere. Suzie said she would rather read a good blog than a book, so Mel has to be doing something right to win points for this one. As you can probably tell, we are often bored (it's a Friday night right now, and we're not at a pub... damn), and we love this Mel's blog for curing this boredom.

Reasons why we like Mellipop Number 4:
She writes comments on our blog! More than we can say for some of you other losers that we apparently call friends.

You and Your Stupid Movie

So turns out we didn't have anything better to do on a Friday night than to go and see a movie. Partly because we couldn't be bothered to get all dressed up and go out somewhere, and Mop happens to work at a movie theatre we she get free tickets (wel actually, they cost $1). How can you pass up a bargain like that? Costs us less to purchase a large popcorn, large coke, two icecreams and a handfull of lollipops than it would to normally purchase two concession tickets! (Damn over exuberant prices at cinemas...)

Even more ironic, is the fact that we went and saw the new Aussie film (gotta support the Australian film industry), "You and Your Stupid Mate".

It was our belief, judging by the past efforts of Australian comedy such as "The Nugget", "Fast Food", and typically anything that stars Jimeoin, that generally such films depict some random, no-hoper, local hero who turns about and saves the country, city or local community library, all at the expense of treating the audience to bad fart jokes and poor comic routines. However, "You and Your Stupid Mate" as far as we are concerned, was well worth the $1 that we paid for tickets, and gave us a few chuckles for an hour and a half. Of course, it was probably no better than those films just previously mentioned, but at least it appeared in no way that the producers of this film were trying to portray this film as real Australian life.

Our current list of classic Aussie films include: "The Castle", "Crackjack", "The Wog Boy", and "Fat Pizza". We probably won't include "You and Your Stupid Mate" in this collection, but if you get a chance, try to go see this most recent representation of Australian's at their most stupid. Maybe one day somebody will write a film that won't make us look like retards, homosexuals (Priscilla, we love it, but really, is it the real Australia?), bad dancers, or even actors to the rest of the world.

But as far as "You and Your Stupid Mate" is concerned, where else could you get a theory as thought out and as witty as this:
If you get a letter, stick it on the fridge for five days. At least then, if it is something bad, you'll have five days more of being happy than someone who would have opened it.
...or when the colour of the water in a pool actually changes when you pee in it!... hehe :)

This shit is BANANAS

Do you know what shit is bananas?? The fact that 8 year old children are singing (and quite enjoying) the lyrics to the admittedly catchy Holla back Girl by Gwen Stefani.

Some of the lyrics to Holla Back Girl (repeated many times to catchy cheerleading music)

• Uh huh, this is my shit
• Ooooh ooh, this my shit, this my shit
• I heard that you were talking shit
• Let me hear you say this shit is bananas

Why is it that songs that are clearly going to have wide airplay must have unnnecessary swearing in them? Primary school age children account for a relatively large proportion of the audience of shows such as Video Hits and various music channels. This means they are constantly exposed to music that has language, images and ideals that are not appropriate for their age.

Pft!

Mop and Suzie's 30 Day Challenge : Day 10

Well... it's day 10 of the challenge and we still have not spent anything on alcohol or taxis. Mop is struggling in a big way but is still hoping to stick to the challenge for the remaining 20 days.

We have however found a few loopholes:
1. Ask a friend to buy the alcohol for us and then pay them back. Technically we are not buying the alcohol, rather paying back a debt.
2. Use a credit card for alcohol or taxi related purchases. Technically, the money that we would be spending is not ours, it's the banks, and we would be paying the bank back after the 30 day challenge.
3. Pay for tickets to an event where the price of the ticket includes alcohol. The money is being used to buy the ticket, not the alcohol.